The So Called Men!

Today, unfortunately I got to see a strange post on Facebook. This post proclaimed that those men who ‘just like’ other  men  and ‘behave like men’ are not gays. Gays are some people who behave like girls, dress up like girls and walk like girls.

I didn’t have to go very deep to understand/know  the immature and prejudiced  mind of the writer of the post. The post is itself an oxymoron. I ask, who will decide the behavior typical of a man? If one goes by the general perception then it is usually assumed that the behavior of a man – is  to like girls! Therefore even if the writer of the post proclaim to be a typical man, others are not bound to agree with him. Others have certain derogatory nouns and adjectives to define such ‘men’ which you all must be aware of. Being called “Gay” is the most respectful salutation which one can expect from those men who don’t have sexual interests in other men.

But one certainly has to go deeper to know the reason why some gays don’t prefer to be called gays. I feel there is no single reason for this. First among many may be the fear of hatred towards gays being unleashed on such people. Irony is – a man is supposed to face difficult situations bravely but these so called men are so timid that they would rather change their identities. If this be so, aren’t   those  so called girly gays, more manly who face the world with a courage?

Another reason may be just hypocrisy to facilitate in keeping your options open.  Due to their inherently coward nature, these people become a skilled opportunist. They would keep having other men, but when it comes to marriage, they would take an about turn and say, “Yaar, ye India hai. Humare yahan ye sab achha nahi mana jata.” etc. etc… I ask to such people – Why this sudden appearance of sainthood? Were they not aware of our social circumstances before indulging in all this? But what can you expect from an opportunist? They certainly would have no answer to this.

One can count few other reasons like this but the fact remains that so called girlish gays are more manly for the simple reason that they have the courage to face the world with their true identity. The so called men are more afraid of society and parents. Many so called girlish gays even have to courage to contemplate and face an eventuality where they will be alone for rest of their life for the want of a life partner who accepts them as such. They think, they act, they face. Therefore I don’t want to believe even for a second that they are any lesser being than others. Of course being a human, they too have certain deficiencies with which they are conducting themselves but that doesn’t mean someone gets the right to demean them.